Name the problem in one.

Business is stressful. Despite the lovely ideal of chequered table cloths, white starched aprons and the smell of baking wafting from the kitchen sadly the day to day stuff of being a restaurant has to be attended too. I am of course referring to paper work and sensible stuff.
Sensible stuff is nothing to do with food, creative energy and smiling happy staff and customers but more to do with phones, electricity, gas, invoices, bills and all that insanely annoying stuff that cannot be avoided.
And it is the things that seem straight forward that frankly could drive you to drink. Having just bought Howies a couple of months ago we are getting through things slowly but slowly.
So the latest challenge has been interesting.
When I say interesting I mean.
Frustrating.
Annoying.
Hair yankingly time consuming.
And legitimately holding the key to the wine cellar - dangerous.

This weekend and today has been all about the mobile phones. We all have them. They are all with different providers and thus we would like to have them all under the one umbrella - aka provider not actual umbrella although that would have been a darn site easier - in addition to that we want to hang onto our own existing phone numbers. So how hard is that?

Well building a life size model of Barrack Obama out of cheese with my feet would be easier. And less time consuming. And you could eat it in the end - providing I wore socks. I digress.

So rather than go to the first place of course you shop around. So the weekend was spent trolling between the phone providers. What an experience that was.
Walk into showroom A and you are completely ignored.
In Showroom B you are swarmed at by 6 men in shiny suits with commission tattooed on their foreheads and run out fast.
Showroom 3 I spent at least 20 minutes with a lovely girl whose accent was so obviously Spanish I made the mistake of digging deep into my Spanish vocabulary - I worked in a bar there 20 years ago - to say 'Si' at which point she stopped, her face spread into a massive grin as she understandably thought I was a mistress of her mother tongue and began talking to me in technology terms about phones, contracts, money - well I assume that's what she was saying. I didn't have a clue or the heart to stop her and tell her my Spanish really consists of una cervesa por favor.Uno grande vasso rosado or pinchos gracias. So after she had finished and as she waited expectantly for my reaction I just grinned back and said 'Gracias.' pointed at my watch and said 'mucho late, haste la vista' Happily she sent me off with a cheery wave I just wish I had understood her, she was charming - but I didn't - so off I went back to the restaurant for sustenance.

Last night was spent trolling the internet to find a deal. At every page I was virtually assaulted with bright flashing offers, so finding the deal is one thing, it's when you have to phone these 08000 numbers and sit in a queue for the rest of the day listening to Mozart or Lady Gaga by which point it's back to lunging at the wine cellar key.

Eventually I did get through to one provider - who shall remain nameless, no they won't it was Talk Talk who started well but then nearly pushed me over the edge. The conversation went like this. After 30 seconds they identify your name. Alison.
'Can I call you Alison?'
Yes
'Thank you Now how can I help you Alison?'
Well I would like to enquire about opening a business account
'Certainly Alison what sort of business account?'
'I don't know. We have a few numbers we need under the one umbrella.'
'Umbrella Alison? OK. Now Alison I will just have to ask my supervisor about that Alison, so if you can hang on Alison? I will come straight back to Alison you Alison'.
By the end of this ridiculous exchange I was back on my laptop googling 'change my name by deed poll fast'.
So Customer Service whoever you are ditch the name thing it put me off hanging on - so I didn't.

So two days into what I naively thought would be a simple process off we went...to another shop on another street where hallelujah we met a guy who knows what he's talking about. He sorted us out and made the whole thing an entirely painless experience. I love him. I do. He is coming to ours for Christmas. If I ever have another child he will be it's Godparent. When you get a great member of staff offering great service it can make not break your day. So once this deal is done I am going to drop off a lovely bottle of white Rioja for his delight and delectation.
Gracias young man.
You stopped me from crawling into the wine cellar with a corkscrew, a straw and a bag of cheese and onion crisps.
Next on the list? The website....help? I can feel the vapours coming on.